Is it possible for an arrangement to turn into real love or a real marriage?

I recently met and married a Yoruba Christian brother, who seems to be very spiritual, as am I.

I have been praying for my “Adam” for 2 years now and I am wondering if I can manifest real love from this.

We have not had sex and I don’t intend to until the completion of our reality. I am however very attracted to him and made him aware of that.

It shouldn’t matter though because I am currently and will continue to be in a state of abstaining from sex.

I have one son and am a college educated teacher by profession.

He has been married before and has children but divorced his wife before coming here. At this early stage I don’t feel any romantic interests from him, but I do feel a general sense of interest and curiosity of him wanting to know who I am.

I think the better we get to know each other the more I surprise him about who I am, what I know spiritually about The Creator, and the proof that the stereo types carried by African -American women are just as invalid as the ridiculous common thoughts many Americans have about Nigerians.

I feel myself that God has the final say so he and I could create this into anything we want, but I think I want real. Should I focus my energy on trying?!

by Lady Green


  1. If an arrangement can turn to true love?
    by: David

    The subject of your question is somewhat different from the actual story, how did you meet the man? through what arrangement (based on your subject head).

    You said that he has divorced his Nigerian wife with the children? well, that rarely happen in Africa. We don’t even live a wife talk of wife and children.

    Well, you sound like the praying type and that is nice. Just pray hard before you engage.


  2. DAVID,
    I met him through a mutual friend, that knew his situation and that he is attempting to keep the ability to remain here in the states. I honestly don’t mind helping him. He is a good brother, with a lot of wonderful qualities. I have feelings for him but sometimes feel like his ego is much too big for his own good. He keeps telling me that I am going to get so much from our situation. I just need to know if it is likely that I will still be married to hi once the process is finished ?

  3. If an arrangement can turn to true love
    by: David

    Well I can’t promise for certain that he would stick with you after the process, if you want to help him, just do it with all your heart and expect your reward from God. If he stays with you, fine. But if he doesn’t move ahead. That is probably a tough advice, I suppose. But that is just it. I have seen African men that are happily married to western women and then I have seen failed relationships.

    some would ask you to run but I usually advice people to follow their heart.

  4. I counsel that you should look before you leap! It is very rare for an African man, especially Nigerian and Yoruba for that matter, to divorce his wife with children. He may use you to accomplish and achieve his desire for stay in the US. Wait to check, test his sincerity. As a serious believer, he should not think of divorce talk less of re- marriage. Truth may be bitter.

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